Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Drive-thru Madness - It Gets Better!

When it comes to Tim Horton's and similar "food" chains that have spread like a fungus across our landscapes, I have little praise to offer. So when I discover a bunch of "Timmies" fans have managed to put together a 'happy' song about Tim Horton's, my gag-reflex goes into full convulsions.

This, if nothing else, proves hands-down how effective corporate strategies can be to convert those who don't ask important questions, into good little repeat customers (i.e. consumers).

When did a corporation ever deserve an anthem? They're supplying coffee and donuts for God's sake, not rules of law, institutions and governance. Let's get real.

The corporate marketting mavens at the top of this (and similar) companies have used the average North American's woeful addiction to caffeine (and sugar) and combined it with their inherent laziness to turn it into a full-blooded, environment-destroying cocktail. How? By way of the replication of thousands of land-wasting, stand-alone outlets scattered like architectural litter right across the entire country, complete with enormous drive-thrus.  Check out any of their outlets, any time of the day, and you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Tim Horton's management and stock holders must be laughing not only all the way to the bank, but also on their way back to the office with this dewy-eyed tripe.  "Suckers!", I can see them saying with their eyes shifting back and forth. (Mr. Burns definitely comes to mind.)

If thousands of people sitting on their jelly-donut stuffed butts in oftentimes gas-guzzling vehicles belching out fumes 24/7 around the country is your idea of something worth cheering about, then you obviously don't give a damn about the planet or your children's future on it.  Partaking in these sorts of activities (using drive-thru's specifically) is the tip of the iceberg as to the level of ignorance and disconnect people have between their behaviour and it's subsequent impact on the environment.

(I have observed, and htis is only an observatoin, that the majority of people in these drive-thru's are women. Often with children in the car. Hmmmm. What kind of message does this send to them?

So next time you have a craving for sugar or caffeine, and MUST satisfy it while on the road, please think about these corporate fleecing experts who couldn't give a damn about your environment or well-being: choose an independent instead. Then park the car and walk up to the counter and speak with the person behind it as if they are fellow human beings. Otherwise we are about to discover that "convenience" is going to come at a very high price.

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If you check out their webpage, they have the audacity to include a "Making A True Difference"/"Environment" section, as if championing the garbage issue has absolved them of all other environmental crimes.

Further, their environmental objectives , although made to look triumphant, are pitiful if they are serious about making a real dent in staving off a global climate disaster due to excessive fossil fuel use.

What irks me even more, is that they intentionally use children's charities and hockey/sport (oh-so Canadian, eh?) as their "do-good-in-the-community" patronages, knowing very well that most people can't possibly see beyond the devious cloaking effect that these motherhood-and-apple-pie inducing sponsorships have.

The bottom line is that this is all a very, very clever marketing gloss-over of what is otherwise essentially a predatory business, that offers cheap, addictive products to as many people as possible with corporate profits being the primary goal.  Don't be fooled. Tim Horton's (and their ilk) are not you buddies.

1 comment:

Rustyone said...

Although I haven't had a "Timmy's" for a few years, (I care about my health.) I don't believe they (the corporate basturds) are as sinister a you have suggested....And in thousands of small towns across Canada they serve as a community gathering point which encourages social interaction. They have replaced the corner bar or the legion as a gathering point... And clearly the addictive quality of coffee pales in comparison to that of alcohol.